From http://erstories.net/?p=63

NOTE:  The last time I e-mailed this,  Posterous did not expand the URL into a full posting.  Therefore, I am copy/pasting the page into an e-mail so that everyone does not have to click a link to view this.  When it comes to clicking a link  in a posting, most people avoid it unless something else in the posting grabbed them.  Then they are motivated to explore.  But a link by its own lonesome self does not invite one to look further.  (Now you won't have to.)

January 4th, 2008 at 10:52 am

Medical Acronyms, Abbreviations, and Sayings Part 1

So this is not a post about a particular case but rather the first in a series of a list of slangly and often offensive medical acronyms. The author admits he does in fact occasionally use some of these - others are very insensitive and he avoids their use. However they are listed since doctors, nurses, and other health care providers as a group generally use them. Feel free to submit some of your own!

1. GOMER - Get Out Of My Emergency Room - Easily the most famous of all medical acronyms - ubiquitously in use. Popularised in Samuel Shem's famous book, "The House of God". Refers to an elderly, demented patient usually from a nursing home. These are not functional individuals. They tend to be bedridden and usually only moan or make other insensible noises. Aggressive treatment of them is usually viewed as fruitless by the medical community.

2. JOG - Juvenile Onset Gomer - A somewhat callous term for a child or young person who has become a GOMER because of some horrible disease, accident, or congenital defect.

3. MFC - Measure For Coffin - Pretty much self explanatory term for someone whose chances of survival are nil.

4. SHPOS - Sub Human Piece Of Sh** - A term for a patient and sometimes for other doctors who are completely rude, useless, violent, abusive, or otherwise a drain on society and a waste of carbon - based matter. See SEEKER below.

5. SEEKER - not an acronym but a shortening of "drug seeker". Basically a drug addict who fakes or exaggerates symptoms to obtain narcotics. Toothaches, Headaches, and Back Pain are the top three most suspicious complaints as they tend to be favoured by seekers. Often the person claims he or she is "allergic " to every other non-narcotic pain reliever made (such as Motrin, Reglan, Toradol, Aspirin, Immitrex, Cafergot, Flexeril, etc) and sometimes even states that he or she is allergic to specific dosages (like "I can only take the 10/325 Percocets, not the 5/325 ). Generally the bane of existence of ER docs.

6. PTBHT or PTBST - Pass The Butter, He's Toast (or pass the butter, she's toast). A person with very poor prognosis. See MFC above.

7. STATUS HISPANICUS - an offensive but often used term (sometime by other Hispanics) describing a hysterical Hispanic patient (traditionally Puerto-Rican or Dominican - almost never Mexican however). Often screaming "Eye yieye yieye yieye" (see Eye- tach below). A spoof of the medical terms "Status Asthmaticus and Status Epilepticus" describing severe, nonstop asthma attacks or seizures. See below OMD below as well. One of the terms I avoid using.

8. OMD - Oh Mi Duele. Means "Oh I have pain!" in Spanish. A take off on EMD which means "electro-mechanical dissociation" - an serious cardiac rhythm disturbance. Used like "She is going into OMD, give her some Morphine".

9. Eye - tach- A spoof of V-tach which is short for Ventricular Tachycardia, a life-threatening cardiac arrhythmia. Someone goes into Eye-tach from OMD - Eyeyeyeyeyeyeyeyeyeyeyeye.

9. Oy- tach- the same as above but describing a Yiddish patient.

10. Double- O Doc - One of my favourites. Take off on 007 meaning a doc with a license to kill. Basically means a very bad and/or stupid doctor.

More to follow! No offense (usually) intended. And OF COURSE these are not official terms ,just slang like the military does. And the Stedman's Dictionary pictured above does not have or endorse them! Duh!

(I particularly liked #10.)

Once I see this is properly posted on Posterous, I will delete the previous 'link-only' version.